Sunday, August 30, 2009
my own enemy
This felt like a long week, which is saying a lot considering my leave on Monday. Did nothing impressive/interesting/memorable this week, which is to say this week was like many other weeks in which I've been wasting my youth. Had trouble sleeping on many nights - the banging cupboards, the blinding lights, the thunderous conversations, the actual thunders, and the missing window pane creating a space for rainwater to gush onto my slumbering body - and that's after downing one pill of melatonin every night. Came to the conclusion that I have intense feelings of animosity against more people than I'd like to admit, and guilt for saying things about others that I ought to have kept within me. Thought about things like a kid, and then realised that things aren't actually so complicated and forgot all about it after I slept. Been wanting to spill out things but realised there really isn't any suitable candidate for me to, and getting depressed at that revelation. Resolved to writing it out but was too lazy to fulfill it. All in all a pretty bad week, but I'm sure it's not the worst yet.
Saturday, August 29, 2009
speed up, please
I just want this to end quickly so that I don't have to follow dumb orders from dumb people who are so dumb to lecture people about life but actually do. And I wouldn't have to see dumb people doing dumb things which are really annoying. And get out of this political mess we've created.
I really hate how I feel sometimes.
Sunday, August 23, 2009
get full
I'm sitting at the computer, doing inane things that I could've done on any other weekend night, staring into space because I am able to, and there's one thing different: yes it's a Monday book-in, for the 3rd time this month. This feels like an extended month, with five weekends, and it's supposed to make my expenditure skyrocket, but I think I'm doing a good job in keeping it as low as possible. Had my longest and furthest run last Sunday with less than 3 hours of sleep, resulting in my semiconsciousness floating along Sheares Bridge to East Coast Park to MtBatten Rd and back to the city. I can't say I wasn't tired, because I was exhausted to begin with, and I'd ended the run feeling that my knees were going to bounce out of its place and ricochet off every surface. Nonetheless, it was fulfilling, knowing that all the training wasn't wasted.
Talking about fulfillment, I haven't decided what I'm going to do tomorrow so as to fully utilise my leave. But it would inevitably (I believe) involve shopping and hence spending. So much for a careful budget in this month with five weekends.
Saturday, August 8, 2009
whirling
Here I am, then, sitting in front of the computer after spending hours on a game which crashed prior to my saving, and lazing in the comfort of my swiveling chair, refusing to go out because I'm just too lazy and the weather too damn hot. Any attempts to step out of the house would immediately succumb me to the scorching inferno, leaving me soaked in sticky and smelly perspiration. Which means shopping at home would be a better choice, and more possible with my meagre allowance delivered to my bank account not long ago. But having spent more than $60 on my threadless retail escapade yesterday, one should think that I should curb my spending for a while. But, alas, no. I need this therapy to soothe my soreness in other area. But when the impulsive buys have been made and the prices look more extravagant than when I have just bought it, I feel bad for wasting money. And then I get more worried and when I get worried I get sore than people have more money than me and I spend indiscriminately and I feel bad and worried and more sore and so on and so forth. I need some other exciting thing to do which does not require my bank account to get sucked like an infant's milk bottle.
Went touring the eastern side yesterday, not like I haven't been there enough. Dom drove to expo with the help of his dysfunctional GPS and went to look for books. I must say the variety is disappointing, but then again the sale wasn't highly publicized and looks deserted enough. Nevertheless, bought 3 books for $20. The real kick from buying at the sale is realising how ridiculously little you've paid for books that could otherwise cost more than double of the sale price. I hope I remember to read them. Ahem. Dinner at siglap was enjoyable with an overaffectionate auntie and overpriced food at a Vietnamese restaurant which was really anything but Vietnamese. I fail to see how Vietnamese a fried rice could get just buy adding chopped peanuts. Quite a letdown given the slightly authentic Vietnamese facade which led us to the place. After some desserts and food reviews (as if we're some atas gourmets), headed home with a bloated tummy and couldn't sleep. Insomnia is really annoying.